Apple’s Inside Job

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I’ve been a journalist for 25 years and to say that I’m only a little cynical would be akin to saying Lady Gaga dresses like a librarian.

I never believe anything that is too good to be true.

So, when I heard an Apple  iPhone prototype was lost and then miraculously found in a Redwood City, Calif., bar, my BS meter spiked.

I think Apple is simply trying to raise the bar when it comes to dominating the news cycle, and the so-called lost iPhone prototype is a plant: a headline-making ruse.

In fact, the Apple marketing team may very well have stolen a page from the Richard Heene Book of Balloon Hoaxes. But instead of putting one of his children in danger, Steve Jobs sent an employee out to get drunk, which is safe as long as he takes a cab home.

Jobs and Apple are the masters of marketing and self-promotion. If there was ever an Oscar given out for generating headlines, the company would beat out by a wide margin President Obama, Donald Trump and Oprah. Check Gizmodo for its version of the truth.

So with that thought in mind, I think this is all a setup. I think Apple planned every bit of this, down to what kind of beer the prototype tester was hammered on when he left the iPhone in that bar.

I have absolutely no evidence that this is true, but since this is a blog and not a news article, evidence isn’t necessary. (My thanks to Al Gore for creating the Internet and making a journalist’s job so much easier.)

I’m simply following a gut feeling.

I find it hard to believe that Apple allows a 27-year-old kid - yes, a kid, at least from my lofty 46 years - take out the new iPhone for a test drive. My father had serious second thoughts about letting me drive his 1969 Plymouth Valiant, so I doubt Jobs would let this little gizmo out of the Apple compound. Not to mention the fact, the only one in this blog, that Apple admitted the iPhone prototype was real and wanted it back. Apple never admits to anything.

So how else could this all transpire?

It’s an inside job.


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